{
  "schema": "tga.work.v1",
  "identifier": "dresden:vol-11:the-census-enumerators-catechism",
  "slug": "the-census-enumerators-catechism",
  "title": "The Census Enumerator's Official Catechism",
  "subtitle": "Satire.",
  "excerpt": "A short satirical essay on the questions a census enumerator might be made to ask if the government decided it needed to know the inner life of every citizen.",
  "year": 1890,
  "volume": 11,
  "category": "Essay",
  "author": {
    "name": "Robert G. Ingersoll",
    "wikidata": "Q360326",
    "viaf": "44331023"
  },
  "isPartOf": {
    "title": "The Works of Robert G. Ingersoll",
    "edition": "Dresden Edition",
    "publisher": "C. P. Farrell",
    "year": 1900
  },
  "license": "https://creativecommons.org/publicdomain/mark/1.0/",
  "url": "https://thegreatagnostic.com/works/the-census-enumerators-catechism/",
  "wordCount": 533,
  "body": "I SUPPOSE the Government has a right to ask all of these questions, and\nany more it pleases, but undoubtedly the citizen would have the right\nto refuse to answer them. Originally the census was taken simply for\nthe purpose of ascertaining the number of people—first, as a basis of\nrepresentation; second, as a basis of capitation tax; third, as a basis\nto arrive at the number of troops that might be called from each State;\nand it may be for some other purposes, but I imagine that all are\nembraced in the foregoing.\n\nThe Government has no right to invade the privacy of the citizen; no\nright to inquire into his financial condition, as thereby his credit\nmight be injured; no right to pry into his affairs, into his diseases,\nor his deformities; and, while the Government may have the right to ask\nthese questions, I think it was foolish to instruct the enumerators to\nask them, and that the citizens have a perfect right to refuse to\nanswer them. Personally, I have no objection to answering any of these\nquestions, for the reason that nothing is the matter with me that money\nwill not cure.\n\nI know that it is thought advisable by many to find out the amount of\nmortgages in the United States, the rate of interest that is being paid,\nthe general indebtedness of individuals, counties, cities and States,\nand I see no impropriety in finding this out in any reasonable way.\nBut I think it improper to insist on the debtor exposing his financial\ncondition. My opinion is that Mr. Porter only wants what is perfectly\nreasonable, and if left to himself, would ask only those questions that\nall people would willingly answer.\n\nI presume we can depend on medical statistics—on the reports of\nhospitals, etc., in regard to diseases and deformities, without\ninterfering with the patients. As to the financial standing of people,\nthere are already enough of spies in this country attending to that\nbusiness. I don't think there is any danger of the courts compelling a\nman to answer these questions. Suppose a man refuses to tell whether\nhe has a chronic disease or not, and he is brought up before a United\nStates Court for contempt. In my opinion the judge would decide that the\nman could not be compelled to answer. It is bad enough to have a chronic\ndisease without publishing it to the world. All intelligent people, of\ncourse, will be desirous of giving all useful information of a character\nthat cannot be used to their injury, but can be used for the benefit of\nsociety at large.\n\nIf, however, the courts shall decide that the enumerators have the right\nto ask these questions, and that everybody must answer them, I doubt\nif the census will be finished for many years. There are hundreds and\nthousands of people who delight in telling all about their diseases,\nwhen they were attacked, what they have taken, how many doctors have\ngiven them up to die, etc., and if the enumerators will stop to listen,\nthe census of 1890 will not be published until the next century.—The\nWorld, New York, June 8, 1890.\n"
}